The other day my family was sitting around cracking open fortune cookies to read their fortunes. Why they had so many fortune cookies, I'm not sure. Perhaps Mama Cat decided to make a pit stop to the Fortune Cookie Factory (and yes, such a place does exists.) Bro Cat pulled out a fortune that read,
"Something on 4 wheels will soon be a fun investment for you!"
WW's response, "Ya, 2 bicycles."
Followed by "Tell your sister that for her blob. See, I'm funny."
Oh Papa Cat...
Monday, February 28, 2011
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Work Is Thieving My Vision
I apologize for the long hiatus since my last post. I have a good excuse, I promise. So… basically I spent the past 2 weeks freaking out because I thought I was going blind in one eye. It all started when I began my new job in January. At work I stare at a computer screen for 8 hours a day, and by the end of the day I could barely read out of my left eye. It felt like I was only wearing one contact lens (for any one who knows the feeling.) OMG my work is thieving my vision!! I spent all last weekend scared sh*tless, thinking that I was going blind and would need a glass eye. A friend of mine even took the courtesy of Googling “glass eye.” Don’t do it, it will only make you feel worse… Thanks MM. After countless conversations with Mama Cat and other close friends making glass eye jokes, I decided to make an appointment to get the situation checked out. Meanwhile, I spent the days leading up to my appointment having slight heart attacks alone in my cubicle, thinking about all the possible causes of my blindness.
Luckily I live in the city that has the best optometry school in the country, and was able to get in for an appointment pretty quickly. Since it is a teaching school, I had a young man in his 3rd year do my eye exam. I could tell he was worried after performing the test, “Which lens is better? 1 or 2? Can you read the letters out to me?” To which my response was, “They’re all bad…and what letters? I can’t even see any letters.” You know something is wrong when a student says “I’ll be right back, I just need to check something with my supervisor.” All I could think was “FML, I need a glass eye.” So 2 hours later, they figured out that I have SUPER dry eyes and the “dryness” (or whatever) was blocking my line of vision in one eye. Really?!? That’s ALL?? Well, it means no contacts for 2 weeks and an eye drop regiment, but at least NO GLASS EYE!!! I really dodged a bullet.
As I was celebrating my new found appreciation for my eyes, the optometry student and his supervisor wanted to check to make sure that there nothing else was wrong with the back of my eyeballs. This involved dilating my pupils, causing blurred vision and sensitivity to sunlight for a couple hours. I had to go back to work after, but I thought, whatever, might as well. (When in Rome?) Yeah, so I get outside and find myself BLINDED by the slight ray of sun poking out from behind the clouds. It literally felt like the lightsabers were being jabbed through my eyes!! I had no idea where the bus stop was, so I wandered up the street, blind, looking like a complete psycho. Luckily I came across a bus stop with a bench; otherwise I never would have been able to see the bus stop sign. Ok, so I managed to get on the bus and get downtown to my office. I sat down at my computer only to realize that I couldn’t read a single thing. So I put some props up on my screen and ate snacks as slowly as I could until the blindness wore off. Wow… what an awesome day.
So this is my warning to you. Hit up the eye drops hard!! (Unless you live in Florida, then you’re probably ok.) Apparently lots of office buildings are super super dry, especially in the winter. Dry eyes can strike without any symptoms, so save yourself the “glass eye scare” and get some drops! People in your office might think you’re getting baked all the time, but at least you won’t look like Frankenstein.
…and that was why I haven’t updated lately. But since the eye situation is under control, there will be more Papa Cat stories to come!
P.S. Helen Keller was an amazing woman.
Luckily I live in the city that has the best optometry school in the country, and was able to get in for an appointment pretty quickly. Since it is a teaching school, I had a young man in his 3rd year do my eye exam. I could tell he was worried after performing the test, “Which lens is better? 1 or 2? Can you read the letters out to me?” To which my response was, “They’re all bad…and what letters? I can’t even see any letters.” You know something is wrong when a student says “I’ll be right back, I just need to check something with my supervisor.” All I could think was “FML, I need a glass eye.” So 2 hours later, they figured out that I have SUPER dry eyes and the “dryness” (or whatever) was blocking my line of vision in one eye. Really?!? That’s ALL?? Well, it means no contacts for 2 weeks and an eye drop regiment, but at least NO GLASS EYE!!! I really dodged a bullet.
As I was celebrating my new found appreciation for my eyes, the optometry student and his supervisor wanted to check to make sure that there nothing else was wrong with the back of my eyeballs. This involved dilating my pupils, causing blurred vision and sensitivity to sunlight for a couple hours. I had to go back to work after, but I thought, whatever, might as well. (When in Rome?) Yeah, so I get outside and find myself BLINDED by the slight ray of sun poking out from behind the clouds. It literally felt like the lightsabers were being jabbed through my eyes!! I had no idea where the bus stop was, so I wandered up the street, blind, looking like a complete psycho. Luckily I came across a bus stop with a bench; otherwise I never would have been able to see the bus stop sign. Ok, so I managed to get on the bus and get downtown to my office. I sat down at my computer only to realize that I couldn’t read a single thing. So I put some props up on my screen and ate snacks as slowly as I could until the blindness wore off. Wow… what an awesome day.
So this is my warning to you. Hit up the eye drops hard!! (Unless you live in Florida, then you’re probably ok.) Apparently lots of office buildings are super super dry, especially in the winter. Dry eyes can strike without any symptoms, so save yourself the “glass eye scare” and get some drops! People in your office might think you’re getting baked all the time, but at least you won’t look like Frankenstein.
…and that was why I haven’t updated lately. But since the eye situation is under control, there will be more Papa Cat stories to come!
P.S. Helen Keller was an amazing woman.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
My Blob
This just in, WW thinks I write a "Blob."
I was talking to Mama Cat on the phone the other night when she said something funny. So Papa Cat asked me "Are you going to write about your mom in your blob now?" One of the many examples of WW's Techno Peasantry...
I was talking to Mama Cat on the phone the other night when she said something funny. So Papa Cat asked me "Are you going to write about your mom in your blob now?" One of the many examples of WW's Techno Peasantry...
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